Long hours in commercial airliners, usually cramped in a coach seat, have provided the material for this page. Let me start by saying that I am not a chronic complainer, although one could draw that conclusion from what follows. Instead, there seems to be a complete absence of airline passenger etiquette in print. I am hopeful my insights below will motivate others to think about habits they employ while traveling, and consider the effects these habits may have on others.
The Seat Back Grabber:
This passenger is completely incapable of removing themselves from a seat without grabbing the seat in front of them. Picture this: You've been trying to get to sleep for hours, and finally enter dreamland. Suddenly, and without warning, you are jarred awake by the seat back grabber! Panic takes hold, as you glance to the window to confirm the aircraft is still airborne. A bolting glance to the offender behind you is rewarded by a "what's your problem" expression. I honestly don't believe people understand how incredibly disturbing seat back grabbing is to others.
Sometimes the seat back grabber earns bonus points by pulling the unsuspecting passengers hair while grabbing the seat back. I used to hand out lots of bonus points, but nature has rendered me a poor source of such points. Additional bonus points may be earned by pulling the seat back while the victim is drinking a stainable liquid. If a spill occurs, bonus points are awarded proportional to the square of the liquid's stainability index.
The Talker:
Honestly, I've had very few flights where this has been a major irritant. Usually a polite, but succinct response to the talker is sufficient to pass the message that you're not interested in conversation. Call me an introvert, but I'm simply not interested in conversing on planes. First, you sit so close to your neighbor that you can count their fillings. It's a personal space issue, and I have no desire to exchange breath with my neighbor (with a few notable exceptions!). Secondly, I usually read, work or sleep while flying. Most people have sufficient IQ to see what's happening and let me be. Often someone wants to know if the book is good, if I like my laptop computer, etc., etc. ... which is fine. The third inhibitor to conversation is ambient noise. Airplanes, by nature, are noisy environments which make hearing difficult at best.
What's needed is a international signaling system, which politely, but firmly, communicates to neighbors that conversation is not my "bag" today. Any ideas?
The Seat Recliner:
I almost didn't include this section, but dog-gone it, it's a problem! Picture this ... you have your laptop open, the display adjusted for the ONLY angle which provides good screen visibility. Suddenly, and without notice, the passenger in front fully reclines their seat. At this point, either your laptop display gets pinched between the tray table and the reclining seat resulting in permanent damage or, if you're lucky, you grab the laptop in time to prevent damage. Let's say you saved your laptop ... no problem, right? Wrong-o!!! This is when you'll find it's impossible to adjust the laptop display angle for optimum visibility when the seat is reclined (unless you want to put the laptop on your lap ... (duh?) ... now admittedly, the name suggests this is a reasonable option, but have you ever tried it? .... if so, can you spell leg burns?).
Every passenger has the right to recline their seat. When I encounter this, I just put my stuff away and live with it. So, it's not our fellow passengers who need to change. Let's challenge the airline operating companies to design a workable seat recliner/tray table solution.
Tray Banger:
This is second in annoyance only to the seat grabber. Tray bangers manifest themselves in a couple of ways. First, there's the passenger who lets the tray table free-fall. Why can't people of otherwise average or better intelligence, understand what an annoyance this is for the poor soul occupying the seat in front of them???? The second type of tray banging activity occurs most frequently during the summer or long holiday weekends. This is when children travel. Isn't it cute to watch little Johnny play pretend bongos on the tray table???? NOT!
The Movie Laugher:
This is not an irritant as much as a wonderful opportunity to embarrass someone. The cabin is dark, a hilarious scene appears on the movie screen, and the man in 31B lets fly with a thunderous laugh. He has obviously forgotten that not everyone has headphones on! Dennis' guidelines on airplane etiquette would call for everyone to turn in their seat and give Mr. 31B one of those inquiring "what the ?%&$# are you doing" kind of looks. I have had people next to me laugh loudly through an entire movie. Please folks, I enjoy laughter as much as the next guy, but remember to respect those passengers who might not be tuned into the movie.
The Luggage Hogs:
Why in the world don't the airlines collectively agree to limit the amount of passenger carry-on items? The amount of stuff people carry on board is truly unbelievable. This puts such a strain on overhead bin space that you can never assume you'll have room for even a single bag. God help those in the front portion of the coach cabin. They're the last to board, and all the folks behind them have stuffed their 3 oversized bags above their seat! There's no room left. Come-on airlines, let's show some leadership! You'll have happier passengers overall, and significantly reduce the time it takes to load an aircraft.
I used to always request an aisle seats. This generally affords a bit
more leg room. Not anymore! All those bags banging against you as the luggage
hogs head down the aisles simply proved too much!
airline travel experiences ... such as:
If you have an interesting story to share ... perhaps an opinion on airline travel etiquette, or a true story of general interest concerning airline passenger behaviors, please pass them along. All submissions added to this page will be credited to the submitter, unless otherwise requested. Of course, I retain all rights to determine which materials are used, and which flow to the "bit-bucket".
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This document is © 1998 by Dennis Ashworth. Contents may be copied with due credit given to the original author. If you decide to copy this page, please drop me a line.